The Land of Make Believe - Every UK Number 1

The Intro

Bucks Fizz’s The Land of Make Believe got the group off to a flying start in January 1982. Unfortunately a few months later came their third and final number 1, the interesting but ultimately lacklustre My Camera Never Lies.

Before

Their fifth single was written and produced, as usual, by Andy Hill, but this was their first chart-topping single co-credited to Nichola Martin. She was Hill’s wife and had helped put the group together for their Eurovision entry and first number 1, Making Your Mind Up.

My Camera Never Lies, their second single from the album Are You Ready, was another attempt to give Bucks Fizz more mature material and prove they weren’t just another cheesy pop group. An ABBA for the 80s, perhaps. Lyrically, this song is similar to The Police’s fifth chart-topper, Every Breath You Take – still a year away at this point. The protagonist doesn’t trust his partner and has been following them around with his camera, which has proven to him that ‘there’s nothing worth lying for’ anymore.

Review

We’re off to a promising start with My Camera Never Lies. The intro brings to mind Trevor Horn’s flashy, shiny production, and you can be fooled into thinking this could even potentially outdo The Land of Make Believe. There’s some nice acoustic guitar that even sounds a little like The Smiths, who formed this year. But the big hook never comes. In fact, the most interesting aspect of the song is the backing vocals, where Mike Nolan, Bobby G, Cheryl Baker and Jay Ashton chant the song title repeatedly in a jerky, stop-start way.

There’s some good elements on display here – but they don’t meld together enough to create a memorable song. And as nice as the production sounds, the performances are sorely lacking any meaning. How are we meant to feel sorry for this guy? He’s stalking someone, and doesn’t sound like he gives a fuck anyway. You could forgive him somewhat if his heart sounded broken! I can give or take some of The Police’s material, but Every Breath You Take, which I already considered a classic, does this so much better.

The video doesn’t help either. It’s basically another excuse for Bucks Fizz to swan around in very contemporary, New Romantic-style outfits, interspersed with them recreating scenes from films including The Wizard of Oz and Gone With the Wind – because, cameras, yeah? They missed a trick by not making an ABBA-style video with a bit of relationship drama, G spying on Ashton, who’s run off with Nolan, for example. I chose Ashton over Kennedy for a reason that will soon become apparent…

After

My Camera Never Lies only spent a week at number 1, and Bucks Fizz never bagged the top spot again. Their next single, the mostly a cappella Now Those Days Are Gone, peaked at eight.

Bucks Fizz returned in late-1982 with If You Can’t Stand the Heat, the first fruits of next LP Hand Cut. It couldn’t get higher than 10, and follow-up Run for Your Life finished at 14.

It was perhaps a little early to be releasing a Greatest Hits in 1983, but they did, and although When We Were Young got to 10, London Town scraped in at 34. They disappeared for a while, failing overexposure.

They maybe didn’t go away for long enough. The album I Hear Talk, released in 1984, showcased a more rock sound, but only Talking in Your Sleep performed well, peaking at 15.

On 11 December, Bucks Fizz were returning from a gig in Newcastle when their tour bus collided with a lorry. All four members of the group and members of the crew were injured, but by far the worst was Nolan, who badly hurt his head and fell into a coma for three days. He nearly died, and still suffers from epilepsy, memory loss and poor vision.

Bucks Fizz returned to action the following year, but Aston quit during promotion of their comeback single You and Your Heart So Blue. She sold her story to the press, revealing she and Hill had been having an affair. The rest of the group distanced themselves from her and a replacement, Shelley Preston, was quickly announced.

In 1986 the new-look Bucks Fizz returned triumphantly with a decent song. New Beginning (Mamba Seyra) deserved to do well, and peaked at eight. However, it was their last single to reach the top 40. Preston departed in 1989 after their last studio LP, the ironically titled The Story So Far.

They continued as a trio for a while, but Baker left in 1993 after having started a successful career as a television presenter. Heidi Manton and Amanda Szwarc were picked to return the group to a quartet, but in 1996 Nolan decided to leave, and was replaced by egomaniac and former Dollar star David Van Day.

Things got messy. G and Van Day didn’t get on well at all, so the latter decided to work with Nolan instead and two new members. G got an injunction resulting in the new group reduced to billing themselves as Bucks Fizz starring Mike Nolan and featuring David Van Day. They released an album of re-recordings and were largely slated, even by fans of the group.

In 2001 Nolan couldn’t stand working with Van Day any longer and left. There followed a protracted legal battle over the rights to the name of the group, resulting in an episode of the BBC documentary series Trouble at the Top covering the mess. The whole sorry affair was settled out of court and Van Day briefly toured as the spectacularly named David Van Day’s Bucks Fizz Show, before returning to Dollar.

The Outro

Baker, Nolan and Aston buried the hatchet and became The Fizz in the 10s, working with Mike Stock of Stock Aitken Waterman.

The Info

Written by

Andy Hill & Nichola Martin

Producer

Andy Hill

Weeks at number 1

1 (17-23 April)

Trivia

Deaths

17 April: Peeress Bridget Monckton, 11th Lady Ruthven of Freeland

Meanwhile…

17 April: Canada repatriates its constitution, gaining full political independence from the UK.

21 April: Walsall FC’s bid to become the first Football League club to ground-share ends when officials condemn their plans to sell the Fellows Park stadium and become tenants at Wolverhampton Wanderers’ Molineux.

23 April: The first British serviceman dies in the Falklands War.

The Intro

Bucks Fizz may be considered a bit of a joke, but they deserve better than that. Not only did they win the Eurovision Song Contest with the sugary sweet Making Your Mind Up, but they went on to have a further two number 1s, and The Land of Make Believe is an excellent pop song with more to it than the fairytale imagery and super-catchy chorus.

Before

Although Bucks Fizz had originally been intended as merely a vehicle for songwriter Andy Hill’s Making Your Mind Up, he and his girlfriend, music publisher Nichola Martin, were determined for the group to sustain that success. Together with RCA Records executive Bill Kimber, they decided to change tack, update the cheesy rock’n’roll sound of their debut, and make the whole project more polished. And it paid off when follow-up single Piece of the Action climbed to 12. That may not sound too impressive, but bear in mind that at the time this was the highest chart placing ever achieved by a Eurovision-winning act with their follow-up single. It became the first track on their eponymous debut LP, which also contained their next single, One of Those Nights. However, this track only reached 20, so alarm bells may have begun to ring. Had the well run dry already?

With this perhaps in mind, Hill sought help from fellow songwriter Pete Sinfield. He had been a founding member and lyricist for King Crimson, before writing words for Emerson, Lake & Palmer. He also wrote the lyrics for Lake’s classic I Believe in Father Christmas. Sinfield moved to Ibiza to live as a tax exile, and by the time he returned to London in 1980, progressive rock was largely extinct.

Sinfield was introduced to Hill and they set to work on Bucks Fizz’s fourth single. Though it may seem a simple task for the man who wrote the words to prog classic LP In the Court of the Crimson King, Sinfield said in a 2002 interview: ‘It is 10 times more difficult to write a three-minute hit song, with a veneer of integrity, than it is to write anything for King Crimson or ELP.’

During the recording, Mike Nolan told Hill he thought the song was a dud, and could even sink the group for good, but the producer told him that Bobby G and Cheryl Baker had already recorded their parts, and what’s more, they loved it. Nolan later admitted he had been totally wrong.

Review

Whether Hill’s fairytale tune came first or not, Sinfield nonetheless wrote lyrics that shone a light on the darkness behind so many fairytales, and that queasy, eerie feeling they can conjure. Though the first verse seems traditional enough:

‘Stars in your eyes, little one
Where do you go to dream
To a place, we all know
The land of make believe’

It’s followed up with this distinctly darker couplet: ‘Shadows tapping at your window/Ghostly voices whisper: “Will you come and play?”‘ and a genuinely creepy

This lyric, and ‘Something nasty in your garden’s waiting/Patiently, till it can have your heart’, take on a whole new meaning when you consider that Sinfield later revealed The Land of Make Believe was in fact an attack on Margaret Thatcher’s Conservative government – something that’s focussed on brilliantly in episode one of director Adam Curtis’s recent BBC documentary Shifty.

Most eerie of all is the ending – usually not played on the radio. It’s a nursery rhyme, read by then-11-year-old Abby Kimber, who was the daughter of the RCA Records executive mentioned earlier:

‘I’ve got a friend who comes to tea
And no-one else can see but me
He came today but had to go
To visit you?
Ya never know’

This gains added weirdness when you consider that young Kimber would a year later star in Minipops, the ill-advised TV show in which young children performed pop songs. The series was cancelled after one series due to complaints over having children dressed up as adults performing songs with sexual lyrics. Conspiracy theorists would have a field day with this song – anti-Thatcher, who was mates with Jimmy Savile… what did Sinfield know?!

The hidden depth to The Land of Make Believe adds lots of appeal – but even if that depth wasn’t there, it’s a great pop song. The chorus is incredibly catchy and the early 80s electro production is leagues above Making Your Mind Up – fair play to Hill and co for not resting on their laurels. And as a young child at the time, I can tell you that this ticked all the boxes when it came to parties and discos.

With sights set on the Christmas market, the video to The Land of Make Believe has lots of pantomime imagery, glitter and sparklers. And for a change it’s Baker, not Jay Aston, that is the video’s sex symbol – which is ironic as it was Aston that chose the outfits.

After

The Land of Make Believe was released in November in time for the Christmas market, but stalled at five during the festive chart itself. However, when Don’t You Want Me finally ran out of steam, Bucks Fizz finally scored their second number 1. The Human League’s Phil Oakey was among many critics, fans and fellow pop stars that were full of praise for the first new chart-topper of 1982. It would be a hell of a year for chart music.

The Outro

A year later, The Land of Make Believe was recorded by future Eurovision winner Celine Dion, whose first UK number 1, Think Twice, was written by Hill and Sinfield.

The Land of Make Believe was covered by pop group allSTARS* in 2002. It reached nine in the singles chart.

The Info

Written by

Andy Hill & Pete Sinfield

Producer

Andy Hill

Weeks at number 1

2 (16-29th January)

Trivia

Births

16 January: Ordinary Boys singer Preston
19 January: Ice hockey player Shaun Wallis
21 January: Rugby union player Nick Duncombe

Deaths

21 January: Actress Penelope Dudley-Ward
27 January: RMS Titanic survivor Frank John William Goldsmith

Meanwhile…

18 January: ‘A Complaint of Rape’ – the third episode of BBC One fly-on-the-wall documentary series Police, shows police treating a female complainant dismissively, which led to changes in police treatment of rape allegations.

21 January: Miners vote against strike action and accept the offer of a 9.3% pay rise from the National Coal Board.

26 January: Unemployment is recorded at over 3 million for the first time since the 1930s.However, the 11.5% of the workforce currently unemployed is approximately half of the record percentage which was reached half a century ago.