The Yorkshire Ripper

479. Adam and the Ants – Stand & Deliver! (1981)

/ robbarker1979

The Intro

Adam and the Ants captivated children of the 80s – myself included. Adam Ant was my first ever musical hero, and where my love of music began. Here’s how a new wave band with niche appeal became a sensation and shot to number 1 for the first time with Stand and Deliver!.

Before

Adam Ant was born Stuart Leslie Goddard in Marylebone, London on 3 November 1954. Goddard’s grandfather on his mother’s side was Romanichal, which planted the seed of protecting minorities that would become a common theme in Goddard’s music.

His parents divorced when he was seven, and his mother worked as a domestic cleaner to make ends meet. In 1967, she briefly cleaned Paul McCartney’s house, and her son later vividly recalled going round there after school.

Goddard was educated at Robinsfield Infants School, where he got into trouble by throwing a brick through the headmaster’s office on two consecutive days. Ironically, this proved to be a wise move, as he was placed under the supervision of a teacher who encouraged his creative side.

At Barrow Hill Junior School, Goddard enjoyed boxing and cricket. He passed his A-plus and went to St Marylebone Grammar School, an all-boys school, where he became a prefect and gained three A-levels. Next was Hornsey College of Art, where he studied graphic design. But before he could complete his BA, he was swayed by a growing love of music, and he dropped out.

Goddard joined the pub rock band Bazooka Joe in 1975 as their bassist. Although the band also featured John Ellis, who became one of The Vibrators, they are most famous for being the headliners of the first ever Sex Pistols gig, at Central St Martins College of Art and Design on 6 November. Goddard was fascinated by the Pistols, while the rest of Bazooka Joe disagreed so strongly, he decided to leave the group and an idea began to form.

Under his new guise, Ant (named ‘Adam’ after the first man and ‘Ant’ after a creature that would survive a nuclear explosion) formed the B-Sides, featuring lead guitarist Lester Square and Andy Warren. On 23 April 1977, with drummer Paul Flanagan, they became The Ants, holding their first band meeting at a Siouxsie and the Banshees gig at the Roxy in Covent Garden. Ant was in the right place at the right time, as the punk scene was exploding, and he became close friends with Jordan, who worked at Malcolm McLaren and Vivienne Westwood’s SEX boutique. She soon became his band’s manager.

Square only lasted a month before leaving to concentrate on his course at art school, though he later formed The Monochrome Set. He was replaced by Mark Ryan, and The Ants began performing regularly around London. Flanagan was replaced in early June by Dave ‘Barbe’ Barbarossa, and The Ants entered a studio for the first time, recording Deutscher Girls and Beat My Guest. These two songs featured in Derek Jarman’s drama Jubilee (1978), in which Ant made his acting debut as The Kid. The Ants sacked Ryan, replaced him with Johnny Bivouac, and became Adam and the Ants.

The leather-clad, post-punk Adam and the Ants had a penchant for controversial fetishist imagery, and were unpopular with the music press, but they gained a cult following. 1978 was a big year, as they made their radio debut, recording a session for John Peel in January. Jordan featured on vocals for their final track Lou, which she used to do regularly at their gigs, but she quit as their manager in May and a day later, Bivouac left the band, to be replaced by Matthew Ashman.

Adam and the Ants recorded a second Peel session in July and at the end of the month they signed a two-single deal with Decca Records. Young Parisians was released in October, but plans for a follow-up were shelved by Decca.

A third Peel session was recorded in March 1979, and the band signed with independent label Do It Records. Second single Zerox was released in July and a month later they began recording their debut album, written and produced by Ant. Soon after, he sacked Ashman and Warren, and the latter joined The Monochrome Set, but Ashman was allowed back. Warren was replaced by Lee Gorman. The LP, Dirk Wears White Sox ( a reference to actor Dirk Bogarde), was released in November. It’s an interesting album, but don’t expect any of the brilliant pop that was around the corner. It did however make it to number 1 on the fledgling UK Independent Albums Chart that launched in early January 1980.

Ant asked Malcolm McLaren to take over as manager of the band, and the former Sex Pistols manager proved to inadvertently have a positive effect on Ant’s career. How? By dropping him and stealing his band. By the end of January, McLaren had persuaded Ashman, Gorman and Barbe to jump ship and join his new group, Bow Wow Wow. Their lead singer was 13-year-old Annabella Lwin, who was briefly joined by George O’Dowd before he became better known as Boy George. Whether Ant

Undeterred, Ant went looking for new Ants. Marco Pirroni, who had been one of Siouxsie’s Banshees, became the new guitarist. They were briefly joined by future Culture Club drummer Jon Moss (using the name Terry 1+2) to remake Dirk Wears White Sox opener Cartrouble as a contractual obligation for Do It, with Pirroni also on bass. The single was produced by Chris Hughes, who Ant subsequently asked to become his new drummer.

Kevin Mooney picked up bass duties, and unusually, there were now two drummers as Terry Lee Miall also joined the band. Ant was to co-write the new material with Pirroni and they signed a publishing deal with EMI. They worked on new material at Matrix Studios and went on the Ant Invasion tour while Ant took the new material to prospective record companies.

The change in direction was startling. Ant and Pirroni used Hughes (now known as Merrick) and Miall to create Burundi-style African drumming to underpin a new sound that was a commercial yet unique mix of pop and new wave. They ditched the leathers and instead of a monochrome look they added tons of colour, dressing as pirates with Native American make-up, and looking and sounding not unlike Johnny Kidd and the Pirates.

Whether these ideas were stolen from McLaren (as their former manager claimed) or vice versa, Ant, who was always incredibly handsome and charismatic, now looked and sounded like a real pop star. It wouldn’t take long to persuade the public he was, either.

Kings of the Wild Frontier was their next single, and what a call to arms it was. Over that soon to become familiar Burundi beat and Pirroni’s rockabilly guitar, Ant began his mission statement by chanting ‘A new Royal family, a wild nobility, we are the family’. He also sang about Native American suffering and declared ‘Antpeople are the warriors, Antmusic is our banner!’ Tremendous stuff, that somehow only scraped into the charts at 48 that summer.

In October came their next single, Dog Eat Dog, which streamlined the formula into a more chart-friendly format. This song, about bands in competition with one another and inspired by a phrase used by Margaret Thatcher, deservedly went all the way to number four.

The following month saw the release of their first hit LP. Kings of the Wild Frontier proved Adam and the Ants weren’t going to be a one-hit wonder. Released as the New Romantic movement was exploding, it contained another mission statement in Antmusic, which peaked at number two in January 1981, being held off the top spot by Imagine in the wake of John Lennon’s death.

Adam and the Ants were so popular, Decca and Do It rushed to plunder their earlier material for a cash grab. Incredibly, Young Parisians climbed to nine. In February the band performed on The Royal Variety Show in a spellbinding performance that caused Ant to shout at Mooney at the close for seemingly going off script. It would be Mooney’s last performance with the Ants, and Gary Tibbs, who had starred in Breaking Glass (1980), took his place. A re-release of the single Kings of the Wild Frontier soared to two.

The band set to work on what was to be the final Adam and the Ants album. Prince Charming’s lead single was to be Stand and Deliver!, in which Ant adopted a new image as ‘the dandy highwayman that you’re too scared to mention’. Ant was a history buff and loved the Georgian era of bawdy flamboyance. He saw it as a perfect vehicle for ‘looking flash and grabbing your attention. And it definitely worked.

Inspiration may have come from several places, including the film The Charge of the Light Brigade (1968), the Monty Python’s Flying Circus 1973 sketch ‘Dennis Moore’, Carry on Dick (1974) – the final entry in the series to star Sid James – and the London Weekend Television series Dick Turpin, that was running on ITV at the time.

Review

It was inevitable that Stand and Deliver! should become Ant’s first number 1, after several near misses. The drums are toned down from previous singles, now providing an exciting underpinning to pure brilliant pop, and Pirroni’s guitar is more modern than the rockabilly sounds of what came before.

There’s memorable vocal hook after hook here, too. If it’s not the opening line, or the triumphant chorus, or the ‘HUH’ after the drums in the chorus, it’s the nonsensical but suitably camp ‘Fa diddley qua qua’ as the song draws to a close.

While you can argue Adam and the Ants were too retro or rock to be New Romantics, this song fits the template, as Ant bemoans the lack of colour and fantasy in pop music. The Blitz Kids may have preferred more electronic sounding music, but they’d have totally agreed with lines like ‘The way you look you’ll qualify for next year’s old-age pension’. And the idea of using fashion as a weapon – ‘Not a bullet or a knife’ will have greatly appealed. It certainly did to little young me, and boys across the country. Ant was already cool, but mutating into a Dick Turpin-style character was bloody genius. In the early 80s I thought Sid James in Carry on Dick was cool. Ant as similar? Simply mind-blowing.

To change from edgy S&M stylings to cartoon childhood heroics is quite a transformation, but Ant more than pulled it off. As a child, he was just amazing. Incredibly handsome, charismatic, flamboyant and fun, Ant was a cartoon hero brought to life. I may have missed out on Beatlemania and Flower Power, glam rock and punk, but I feel proud to have been a young boy when Ant was at the height of his fame.

In theory I was too young – I was only two when this was number 1. But I can remember leaping from chair to settee in our living room to Adam and the Ants’ videos, and there’s a photo of me proudly holding an Ants’ single. So the band must have already split by the time I was in love with them, so brief was their fame. But listening to this and watching the video now, it’s clear that Adam and the Ants could only ever be huge for a short time – in a similar way to early T Rex. But what a time!

Ashes to Ashes may have heralded the start of the rise of music videos in the 80s, but with Stand and Deliver!, Ant grabs the torch and gallops away with it. Ant worked with director Mike Mansfield to create ‘a Hollywood movie in three minutes’, and they certainly succeeded. Ant is going round holding up mirrors to his victims – including a man who looks scarily similar to Boycie from Only Fools and Horses, which started this same year. The video, which also features Ant’s then-girlfriend Amanda Donohoe, climaxes with our hero about to be hanged before escaping with the rest of the Ants, and then ends with a topless Ant staring at himself in the mirror, alone. What did this mean? Was it Ant contemplating his own lyrics? Was it his true self, behind the mock heroics? Or was it just a chance to look hot and make his female fans swoon? Whatever it was, it hinted at the title track of their last LP, and next number 1.

After

Stand and Deliver! was an instant smash, debuting at number 1 and staying there for five weeks. It was the third biggest-selling single of 1981, and solidified Ant as a household name that year.

The Outro

20 years later, a troubled Ant made a well-meaning but ill-advised new version of his first number 1, called Save the Gorilla. Ant was trying to raise awareness of the plight of mountain gorillas in Central Africa, and the production is decent enough, but an overweight Ant trying to squeeze his new lyrics into one of his classics just seemed a bit silly. Pirroni helped to block its release.

The Info

Written by

Adam Ant & Marco Pirroni

Producer

Chris Hughes

Weeks at number 1

5 (9 May-12 June)

Trivia

Births

13 May: Labour Party MP Luciana Berger
15 May: Equestrienne Zara Phillips
16 May: Actor Joseph Morgan/Actor Jim Sturgess
17 May: Footballer Leon Osman
20 May: 5ive pop star Sean Conlon
22 May: Comedian Sara Pascoe
26 May: Broadcaster James Wong
29 May: Rugby union player Rochelle Clark
9 June: Backstroke swimmer Helen Don-Duncan/Scottish football plater Alex Neil/Musician Anoushka Shankar
11 June: Scottish field hockey goalkeeper Alistair McGregor

Deaths

9 May: Footballer Ralph Allen/Socialite Doris Harcourt
10 May: Conservative Party MP Geoffrey Stevens
15 May: Liberal Party MP Margery Corbett Ashby
17 May: Classical scholar WKC Guthrie
18 May: Novelist Verity Bargate
19 May: Ornithologist Collingwood Ingram
23 May: Radio producer Rayner Heppenstall
24 May: Actor Jack Warner
27 May: Scientist Kit Pedler/Philologist Anne Pennington
28 May: Archaeologist John Bryan Ward-Perkins
29 May: Organist John Dykes Bower
31 May: Economist Barbara Ward, Baroness Jackson of Lodsworth
10 June: Welsh journalist Sir Trevor Evans

Meanwhile…

9 May: The 100th FA Cup final at Wembley Stadium ends as a 1-1 draw between Manchester City and Tottenham Hotspur. 

11 May: Andrew Lloyd Webber’s musical Cats debuts at New London Theatre.

12 May: 25-year-old Francis Hughes becomes the second IRA hunger striker to die in Northern Ireland.

13 May: The New Cross fire inquest returns an open verdict on the thirteen people who died as a result of their injuries in the New Cross fire.

14 May: Spurs are victorious in the FA Cup final replay with a 3-2 win. It’s the sixth time they’ve won the trophy.

15 May: The Brixton riots inquiry opens.

19 May: Peter Sutcliffe is found guilty of 13 charges of murder, and a further seven attempted murders.

21 May: The IRA hunger strike claims two more deaths – Raymond McCreesh (24) and Patrick O’Hara (23).

22 May: Peter Sutcliffe is sentenced to life imprisonment.

27 May: Liverpool FC becomes the first British team to win the European Cup for the third time, defeating Real Madrid 1-0 at Parc des Princes in Paris.

30 May: More than 100,000 people march to Trafalgar Square in London for the Trade Union Congress’s (TUC’s) March For Jobs.

3 June: Sherman wins the Epsom Derby.

11 June: Queen Elizabeth II opens the NatWest Tower.

474. John Lennon – Woman (1981)

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The Intro

John Lennon’s tender ballad Woman was the first single released after his murder, and his third and final solo number 1. This touching tribute to his wife Yoko Ono served as a sequel of sorts to Girl, from The Beatles’ Rubber Soul. Ironically, it was the first time an artist had replaced themselves at number 1 since I Want to Hold Your Hand replaced She Loves You in 1963.

Before

Only three days before he was shot dead, Lennon told Rolling Stone that he was inspired to write Woman ‘one sunny afternoon in Bermuda’. It suddenly hit him how much women are taken for granted, and Lennon – whose relationships with women were certainly complex, right back to his feelings for his mother – decided to pay tribute to Ono. Ironically, considering the blame Ono wrongly got for breaking up his old band, he considered Woman the most Beatles-sounding track on his final album, Double Fantasy. This track is also the only example of a song title used by both Lennon and Paul McCartney for their own separate songs. McCartney’s Woman, written in 1966 under the pseudonym Bernard Webb, was recorded by folk duo Peter and Gordon.

Lennon’s Woman was recorded at sessions on 5 and 27 August, and 8 and 22 September 1980. In addition to lead vocal, he also played an acoustic guitar. Joining him were Earl Slick and Hugh McCracken on guitar, Tony Levin on bass, George Small on piano and synthesiser, Andy Newmark on drums, Arthur Jenkins on percussion, and Michelle Simpson, Ritchie Family members Cassandra Wooten and Cheryl Mason Jacks, and Eric Troyer on backing vocals.

Review

Woman was the highlight of Double Fantasy. The LP is often guilty of being too slick, but the glossy production works in favour of this track, rather than against it. Although Lennon considered it a sequel to Girl, it’s lyrically similar to Jealous Guy. He’s directly apologising to Ono again for past behaviour (perhaps the ‘Lost Weekend’?), but also paying tribute to all women. It would be nice to think, after the stories of his sometimes violent history with women, that this was Lennon at his most honest and contrite.

Opening with a barely audible ‘For the other half of the sky’, there’s sterling synth work from Small, and warm Beatles-like guitar from Slick and McCracken. Somehow, despite the sheen, the swooning backing vocals, and the lack of decent lyrics in the chorus, it’s lovely and really charming. And inevitably, this single gained huge added poignancy following Lennon’s death. A fitting Valentine’s Day number 1, indeed.

But what was going on with that chorus? ‘Ooooh, well well, do-do-do-do-do’ was surely a placeholder that Lennon and Ono decided to leave in? And they say McCartney missed Lennon’s quality control…

Speaking of quality control, I have to mention the official video to Woman. I’m in genuine shock. Ono edited the video in January, and understandably, she will have been in pieces. However, the video veers from touching, with footage of the couple in Central Park two months previous, to poor taste, including the pic of Lennon and his killer, lifted from a newspaper. But what’s really shocking is the image of Lennon’s side profile from the back of the Imagine album, made to morph into the last ever photo of Lennon – in the morgue. Unbelievably, this remains in the official video on YouTube.

After

Woman was the last solo number 1 for John Lennon. However, the outpouring of emotion after his death resulted in Roxy Music’s cover of Jealous Guy knocking Joe Dolce Music Theatre from the top spot. Inevitably, people moved on from their grief, and the next single, Watching the Wheels, only peaked at 30.

Three years later, Ono was finally able to work on Milk and Honey, which was the couple’s next projected LP. Lennon’s work was inevitably a little rough and ready as it had been tragically left unfinished, but Nobody Told Me – originally meant for Ringo Starr – was a number six hit. The follow-up, Borrowed Time, was his last original charting single, making it to 32.

Reissues of Jealous Guy and Imagine failed to reach the top 40 in the 80s, but in the 90s the legend of The Beatles grew in stature once more, thanks in part to Britpop and a newfound appreciation of 60s guitar groups. This coincided with the Anthology project, where Lennon’s 1977 demo of Free as a Bird, and 1979 home recording of Real Love, were transformed into ‘new’ Beatles recordings, courtesy of the surviving members and producer Jeff Lynne. Amazingly, neither went to number 1.

In 2010 a new ‘Stripped Down’ version of Double Fantasy was released. The aim was to remove some of the studio gloss of the original album, and sometimes this worked well. Not with Woman. Part of this song’s appeal was in the production. The 2010 version, shorn of sheen, simply sounded like a demo, not a remix. However, it’s noteworthy that you can hear Lennon drawing his breath in at the close, seemingly a deliberate nod to Girl.

Thanks to AI sound-limiting technology used in Peter Jackson’s excellent Get Back project, McCartney finally felt he could finish Now and Then, the Lennon demo from around 1977 that had been started for Anthology 3 before Harrison refused to continue. Hearing Lennon’s voice, shorn of rough-and-ready ghostly tape echo a la those Anthology 1 and 2 songs, was a beautiful, spine-chilling moment. In 2023, 54 years after The Ballad of John and Yoko, The Beatles were back at number 1.

The Outro

For many years, Lennon’s many flaws (and to be fair, he was very vocal about his failings in his lifetime) were forgotten and because his life was cut tragically short, he became a bona fide icon. A Godlike figure, who age did not dull. The cool, edgy Beatle – which understandably irked McCartney to a degree.

But Lennon’s stature has fallen somewhat in today’s cancel culture. McCartney is often now considered the cool one, his family focused lifestyle now attracting plaudits where he was once laughed at. Lennon may very well have been a nightmare in the age of social media, and his musical comeback may have soon resulted in bland MOR pop (the signs were certainly there in some of Double Fantasy).

However, the truth is more complex than that. Lennon was a troubled man and also one of the greatest singer-songwriters there has ever been – anyone arguing he is the greatest would have a very good argument. The extent to which he was mourned when he passed, and his influence on the era’s number 1s, is more than justified.

The Info

Written by

John Lennon

Producers

John Lennon, Yoko Ono & Jack Douglas

Weeks at number 1

2 (7-20 February)

Trivia

Births

8 February: Actor Ralf Little
9 February: Actor Tom Hiddleston
10 February: TV presenter Holly Willoughby
17 February: Conservative MP Andrew Stephenson

Deaths

10 February: Civil engineer Sir Hubert Shirley-Smith
12 February: Tennis player Murray Deloford
13 February: Writer Eric Whelpton
17 February: David Garnett
18 February: Comic impressionist Peter Cavanagh
19 February: Actress Olive Gilbert/Conservative MP Leonard Plugge
20 February: Cricketer Brian Sellers

Meanwhile…

9 February: Shirley Williams resigns from Labour’s national executive committee. 

12 February: The purchase of The Times and Sunday Times newspapers by Rupert Murdoch from The Thomson Corporation is confirmed.
Also on this day, Ian Paisley is suspended from the House of Commons for four days after he calls the Northern Ireland Secretary a liar.

13 February: The National Coal Board announces widespread pit closures.

15 February: For the first time, Football League matches take place on a Sunday.

16 February: Two are jailed in connection with the death of industrialist Thomas Niedermayer who had been kidnapped by the Provisional IRA in 1973.

18 February: The Conservative government withdraws plans to close 23 mines following negotiations with the National Union of Mineworkers.
Also on this day, Harold Evans is appointed editor of The Times.

20 February: Peter Sutcliffe is charged with the murder of 13 women.

472. St. Winifred’s School Choir – There’s No One Quite Like Grandma (1980)

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The Intro

The shocking death of John Lennon in December 1980 saw the singles chart understandably awash with his material, old and new. Happy Xmas (War Is Over) was among them. And yet, this novelty song by St Winifred’s School Choir become Christmas number 1. Lennon’s murder proved the world could be an awful place. There’s No One Quite Like Grandma was the icing on this shit cake.

Before

St Winifred’s School Choir was formed at St Winifred’s Roman Catholic Primary School in Stockport in 1968. A local newspaper cutting from 1972 reveals that the choir first recorded that year, at 10cc’s local Strawberry Studios. Miss Olive Moore was their conductor, with Miss Terri Foley on guitar.

In 1978, the choir were selected to provide backing vocals on Brian and Michael’s Matchstalk Men and Matchstick Cats and Dogs (Lowry’s Song). Pupils sang The Big Ship Sails on the Alley-Alley-O as a counterpoint to the song’s chorus as it draws to a close. When the single became a surprise number 1, St Winifred’s School Choir got to appear on Top of the Pops. And that should have been the end of it.

The choir’s brush with fame (pun intended) saw them signed to EMI’s Music for Pleasure (MFP) in 1979. MFP was a budget label, often releasing cheap compilations or re-recordings of popular film and TV soundtracks. Popular with the older record buyer, and families, it was a natural home for St Winifred’s School Choir. Referred to as ‘The Matchstalk Children’ on the sleeve of their debut single, Bread and Fishes, the children were arranged in a circle – boys in blue, girls in pink – with Miss Foley (now credited as Chorus Master) strumming away next to Sister Aquinas – the ‘Management’. MFP were so cheap, the sleeve was reused for their debut LP, And the Children Sing – which featured covers of Any Dream Will Do and Mull of Kintyre.

In 1980, their second album, My Very Own Party Record, featured wall-to-wall bangers like If You’re Happy and You Know It and London Bridge. Most likely with one eye on the Christmas market, and remembering how well 1971 number 1 Grandad had performed, they chose There’s No One Quite Like Grandma.

Gorden Lorenz had been a travelling evangelist before turning to music, where he learned his way around the recording studio by writing music for Border Television to be used between their daytime shows. In 1980, Lorenz saw an opportunity to cash in on the Queen Mother’s 80th birthday. He wrote There’s No One Quite Like Grandma and sent a demo to EMI, despite not being convinced himself that it was any good. At first they turned it down. However, one day he received a call from the managing director, who said they couldn’t get the chorus out of my mind, and he suggested they put it out at Christmas. Using St Winifred’s School Choir, fresh from their Top of the Pops appearance, was an evil masterstroke, designed to tug at the heartstrings.

Review

There are no positives to mention when discussing There’s No One Quite Like Grandma. The worst number 1 in many years, and the worst festive chart-topper of the 80s, is an abomination, plain and simple.

It’s painful to listen to, with wretched production, and is an example of how shameless and cynical the music business could be and would become. That it kept Happy Xmas (War Is Over) and Stop the Cavalry from the Christmas number 1 spot makes it even more awful.

The lyrics are abysmal, and read like one of those awful poems you occasionally see on Angry People in Local Newspapers. The children singing on the record could probably create better rhymes than Lorenz did. Your honour, I give you:

‘There’s no one quite like Grandma,
She always has a smile,
She never hurries us along,
But stays a little while’

Worst of all is the lead vocal by Dawn Ralph. Of course, that’s not her fault, she was just a little girl with the kind of sickly sweet, short-tongued voice that fitted the bill perfectly. But without getting too personal, her performance on that Top of the Pops appearance above reminds me of the twin girls in The Shining. It gives me chills, and I don’t think I’m alone in feeling this way.

Dreary, vapid and queasy, There’s No One Quite Like Grandma is a throwback to the novelty number 1s of the early years of the charts, such as Lita Roza’s (How Much Is) That Doggie in the Window?. 1980 was a bumper year for chart-toppers – 25 in fact. There’s No One Quite Like Grandma is easily the worst of the year and the earliest frontrunner for worst of the decade. On the plus, side, my youngest daughter asked me what I was writing about, so I showed her the clip, and she thought Ralph was singing ‘No-one fights like Grandma’. Now there’s an idea for a sequel.

After

St Winifred’s School Choir’s reign was mercifully short – lasting only a fortnight. Such was the magnitude of Lennon’s death, the end of the festive season saw his records ruling the roost again. But at least their Christmas number 1 helped to pay for new carpets and classroom facilities at the school.

Thankfully, St Winifred’s proved to be a one-hit wonder, though the choir continued recording albums until 1985’s 20 All-Time Children’s Favourites.

However, in 1986 came It’s ‘Orrible Being in Love (When You’re 8 ½), credited to Claire and Friends. Claire and her pals went to St Winifred’s, and the song was written by Mick Coleman and produced by Kevin Parrott, AKA Brian and Michael. St Winifred’s School Choir provided backing vocals, though they were uncredited. The single reached 13, and is no doubt also hard work, but because I was seven when it was released, I can’t help but have a soft spot for it. That’s nostalgia for you.

In 1990, St Winifred’s School Choir teamed up with Ziba Banafsheh to record the single A Better World, in aid of Mother Theresa of Calcutta’s charity. Three years later they were uncredited for their performance on Bill Tarmey’s (Coronation Street‘s Jack Duckworth) cover of Barry Manilow’s One Voice, produced by Mike Stock and Pete Waterman.

In 2009, 14 of the 1980 line-up teamed up to re-record There’s No One Quite Like Grandma, produced by drinks company Innocent in aid of Help the Aged and Age Concern.

The Outro

Among the choir responsible for the original There’s No One Quite Like Grandma were two who became actresses. Most famous is Sally Lindsay, who starred in Coronation Street as Shelley Unwin. The other, Jennifer Hennessy, starred in The Office and Doctor Who. Neither were involved in the remake, and nor was Ralph, who refuses to give interviews. Can’t blame her.

The Info

Written by

Gordon Lorenz

Producer

Peter Tattersall

Weeks at number 1

2 (27 December 1980-9 January 1981)

Trivia

6 January 1981: Novelist Andrew Britton

Deaths

27 December 1980: Golfer Eric Green/Golfer Arthur Havers
29 December: Jazz pianist Lennie Felix/Businessman John Wall, Baron Wall
31 December: Marxist philosopher Maurice Cornforth
2 January 1981: Actor Victor Carin
3 January: Princess Alice, Countess of Athlone
4 January: Royal Navy captain Gordon Charles Steele
5 January: Aircraft engineer Sir James Martin
6 January: Aristocrat Ernestine Bowes-Lyon/Scottish novelist AJ Cronin/Labour Party MP Tom Litterick
7 January: Broadcaster Alvar Lidell
9 January: Racing driver Sammy Davies/Scottish artist William MacTaggart

Meanwhile…

28 December 1980: The Independent Broadcasting Authority (IBA) awarded TV-am the first ever breakfast television contract.

2 January 1981: 34-year-old lorry driver Peter Sutcliffe, from Bradford, was arrested in Sheffield. After two days of questioning in Dewsbury, he admitted he was the serial killer known as the Yorkshire Ripper.

4 January 1981: British Leyland workers voted to accept a peace formula in the Longbridge plant strike.

5 January: Sutcliffe was charged with the murder of 13 women and attempted murder of seven more between 1975 and 1980.
Also on this day, the TV adaptation of Douglas Adam’s radio series The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy began on BBC Two, while Norman St John-Stevas departed the Conservative Party Cabinet, to be replaced by Leon Brittan and Norman Fowler.

7 January: A parcel bomb addressed to Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher was intercepted.

8 January: A terrorist bomb attack happens on the RAF base at Uxbridge.

    469. Blondie – The Tide Is High (1980)

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    The Intro

    Blondie’s last number 1 before their 1999 reformation was The Tide Is High, a cover of the 1967 rocksteady tune by Jamaican ska group The Paragons.

    Before

    The original was written by John Holt, tenor singer in The Paragons, who were a vocal trio from Kingston, Jamaica. Instrumental backing came from Tommy McCook and the Supersonic Band, with production by Duke Reid. This amiable slice of gentle ska was originally tucked away as a B-side, then released as a dub version with vocal from U-Roy in the UK in 1971.

    One of the reasons Blondie were so cool was their willingness to dabble in other genres. Heart of Glass, one of the best disco and rock tracks of 1979, had been tried as a reggae song beforehand. It was singer Deborah Harry and guitarist Chris Stein’s idea to cover The Tide Is High, after they heard the original on a compilation tape they picked up in London.

    Perhaps in an effort to dissolve rising tensions among the band, producer Mike Chapman insisted the band record their fifth album in Los Angeles. Autoamerican took Blondie’s eclecticism to whole new levels. There was Rapture, their attempt at rap, the orchestral and electronica of opening track Europa, and their stab at The Tide Is High. Rumour has it that Harry and Stein were such fans of The Specials, they asked the Coventry ska collective to be the backing group for this cover, but they declined. Considering how some of Blondie reacted to not featuring on Call Me, that might be just as well.

    Review

    The late 70s and early 80s saw Blondie amass quite the collection of chart-toppers. One of the best, in fact, particularly Heart of Glass and Call Me. Keeping up that standard would be a tall order for even the greatest bands. So it is perhaps inevitable – especially as they approached the twilight of their original run – that Blondie eventually came up short.

    It’s not that The Tide Is High is bad – it most certainly is not. It’s just, OK. Fair play to the band for taking a different tack, dropping down a gear or two and covering a bright and breezy forgotten ska tune, and incorporating horns and strings into their arsenal. But the song wasn’t a classic to begin with, and there’s little that Blondie and Chapman can add to it to make it any better. They change the sex around in the lyrics, casting Harry in an unlikely role – the girl who’s struggling to get the man she wants. Other than that, it’s pretty much, well, a nice enough track, I guess. Harry’s voice suits it well, as she manages to sing sweetly without putting in much effort. Nonetheless, it’s the weakest their number 1s.

    The most interesting element of The Tide Is High is the frankly bizarre video. The male members of the band are stood on a sidewalk watching Harry from below. Suddenly the outside of the building is supposed to look like it’s underwater. And Darth Vader seems to be watching on too? There’s also footage of a rocket about to be launched. As the song ends, Blondie and a load of revellers meet up with Vader, but when Vader turns around, his face mask resembles a duck… the fact that Harry still looks cool and sexy while singing to Duck Vader as the video ends shows what an amazing woman she is.

    After

    The Tide Is High was the first single from Autoamerican, but just as it was looking like every single they released would be a number 1, their fortunes changed. Even the follow-up, and one of their most famous tunes, Rapture, stalled at five on these shores. Only one more album, The Hunter in 1982, was released before the band split for 17 years.

    The Outro

    Electronic duo Coldcut remixed The Tide Is High for the 1988 compilation Once More into the Bleach. Seven years later it was remixed by Pete Arden and Vinny Vero for Beautiful: The Remix Album. In 2014 Blondie re-recorded the track needlessly for Blondie 4(0) Ever.

    The Tide Is High (Get the Feeling), a remake with a new bridge, became girl group Atomic Kitten’s second number 1 in 2002. Again, serviceable enough, but less so than Blondie’s version.

    The Info

    Written by

    John Holt

    Producer

    Mike Chapman

    Weeks at number 1

    2 (15-28 November)

    Trivia

    Births

    18 November: Actor Mathew Baynton
    19 November: Businessman Andrew Copson/Actress Adele Silva

    Deaths

    15 November: Novelist Joan Fleming/Conservative MP Richard Law, 1st Baron Coleraine/Scottish painter Agnes Miller Parker
    16 November: Actress Imogen Hassall
    17 November: Neuroscientist David Marr
    18 November: Artist Richard Carline
    19 November: Chemist EJ Bowen/Northern Irish footballer Laurie Cumming
    22 November: Painter Norah McGuinness
    25 November: Trade unionist Dorothy Elliott/Crystallographer Mary Winearls Porter
    26 November: Actress Rachel Roberts/Actor Hector Ross
    27 November: Physicist John Hubbard
    28 November: Peer Antony Lyttelton, 2nd Viscount Chandos/Filmmaker Tom Stobart

    Meanwhile…

    17 November: 20-year-old university student Jacqueline Hill is murdered in Headingley, Leeds. She is the final known victim of The Yorkshire Ripper.

    23 November: With the UK in recession, the government announces further public spending cuts and taxation rises.

    468. Barbra Streisand – Woman in Love (1980)

    / robbarker1979

    The Intro

    As the 80s dawned, The Bee Gees knew their second peak couldn’t last forever. But moving into writing and producing for others proved very fruitful. Superstar actress and singer Barbra Streisand initially asked Barry Gibb to write half the album Guilty. He went on to produce the whole LP and Woman in Love became her biggest UK hit.

    Before

    Barbara Joan Streisand was born on 24 April 1942 in Brooklyn, New York City. Her father died soon after her first birthday, and the Streisands struggled financially, with her mother working as a bookkeeper. She was also a semi-professional singer, but she was initially reluctant when her daughter showed an interest in performing. At the age of nine, Streisand had already failed an audition for MGM. But her mother came round to the idea and she helped her 13-year-old daughter record a demo.

    However, Streisand’s main ambition was to be an actress. At 16 she left school and moved out, taking on a number of menial jobs to make ends meet while striving for acting jobs. She became an usher in 1960 and auditioned for The Sound of Music. Although she failed, the director was impressed and urged her to include singing on her resumé. She entered a talent contest at gay nightclub Lion in Greenwich Village and stunned the audience into silence. Returning after winning for several weeks, she decided to change her first name to ‘Barbra’. Determined to make it her way, she refused to contemplate suggestions she have a nose job to improve her chances of mainstream appeal. Her first professional engagement came in September 1960 as support for the comedian Phyllis Diller.

    Streisand spent the next few years honing her act and developing her between-song patter. She made her TV debut on The Tonight Show in 1961 and her Broadway debut the following year in the musical comedy I Can Get It for you Wholesale. At the age of 21 she signed with Columbia Records, gaining full creative control, in exchange for less money. A respectable position to take, and just as well, because they wanted her debut LP to be called Sweet and Saucy Streisand. It was eventually released as The Barbra Streisand Album in 1963.

    In 1964 Streisand returned to Broadway for Funny Girl, which became an overnight success. People became her first US charting single, peaking at five, and she even made the cover of Time. Streisand’s UK chart debut came in 1965 with Second Hand Rose, which climbed to 14. In 1968 she won her first Academy Award, for Best Actress, after starring in the cinema version of Funny Girl.

    The British Invasion dented Streisand’s mainstream musical appeal, like many stars of her ilk. But during the 70s her fortunes improved, with a return to the singles chart in 1970 with Stoney End – six in the US, 27 in the UK. One of her signature tunes, the haunting The Way We Were from the film of the same name, became her first Billboard number 1 in 1973, yet strangely it only climbed to 31 in the UK. Her role alongside Kris Kristofferson in the 1976 remake of A Star Is Born was huge, and Evergreen (Love Theme from ‘A Star Is Born’) was her second US chart-topper, soaring to three over here. She also won an Oscar for Best Song for Evergreen.

    Her version of Neil Diamond’s You Don’t Bring Me Flowers was so popular, an unofficial duet was achieved by splicing Streisand and Diamond’s recordings. When an official duet was released in December 1978, Streisand achieved her third Billboard number 1. A year later, another duet saw her cross over successfully into disco. No More Tears (Enough Is Enough) teamed Streisand with Donna Summer and was co-produced by the genius Giorgio Moroder. Back at the peak of Billboard for the fourth time, it peaked at three in the UK. Streisand was named the most successful US female singer of the 70s.

    Between February 1979 and March 1980, Streisand worked on her 22nd album, Guilty. She was so impressed with Gibb’s production and songwriting, he contributed to every song, with Robin co-writing five songs, and Maurice joining them for the title track. Production was credited to Gibb-Galuten-Richardson, which saw Barry team up with producer Albhy Galuten and sound engineer Karl Richardson, who produced Bee Gees number 1s Night Fever and Tragedy. Barry and Robin co-wrote lead single, Woman in Love, and Barry was credited with acoustic guitar and arrangement.

    Review

    You can always tell when a song has been written by the Gibb brothers, even if they don’t record it. Their marks are all over it – all you have to do is imagine the vocals made a lot higher. This rule works here. Unfortunately, that’s about the most interesting thing I can say about Woman in Love. It’s a very pedestrian love song masked in glossy production. I don’t understand why it was so popular, other than that perhaps it was due to Streisand’s stock being so high on the back of her role in A Star Is Born (the video is simply a compilation of scenes from the film) and her duet with Summer. There’s no amazing vocal prowess on display, the lyrics are unremarkable and the tune is lacklustre. Certainly one of the lesser number 1s of 1980.

    After

    Nonetheless, Woman in Love was a smash hit around the world, topping the charts in the US, Australia, Spain – pretty much everywhere, in fact. The parent album Guilty was also huge, despite no further real success in the UK singles chart (the title track only made it to 34). It would be four years before her next studio LP, Emotion. In 1985, despite objections from Columbia, Streisand returned to her roots with The Broadway Album. Three years later, Streisand was in the UK top 20 for the first time since Woman in Love, with the title track to Till I Loved You – a duet with Miami Vice star Don Johnson, which peaked at 16.

    The 90s started very well for Streisand. She directed, co-produced and starred in the romantic drama The Prince of Tides (1991). Places That Belong to You, from the soundtrack, saw her back in the singles chart at 17. In 1993 she announced her return to live public concerts for the first time in 27 years. At the time, she was the highest-paid concert performer ever and won five Emmy Awards. She left the limelight again for a few years, but made a triumphant return in 1996, producing, directing and starring in another romantic comedy – The Mirror Has Two Faces. From the soundtrack came the number 10 hit duet I Finally Found Someone, with Bryan Adams. Then, a year later, a duet with Celine Dion – Tell Him, soared to number three. It is to date her last top 10 single.

    The new millennium began with sad news for Streisand’s fans, as she announced she was to retire from public performances. But she did return to the movie world, starring in 2004 comedy Meet the Fockers. Album releases continued, including Guilty Too, a second collaboration with Gibb, in 2005. A year later, aged 64, she announced she was to tour once more, and became one of the highest-grossing performers in the world yet again. Amazingly it took until 2009 for Streisand to make her performance debut on British TV, when she appeared on Friday Night with Jonathan Ross.

    In 2014, Streisand released Partners, an album featuring duets with Lionel Richie, Billy Joel and, from beyond the grave, Elvis Presley. Her last album to date was Walls in 2018, the title of which was a reference to the singer’s condemnation of President Donald Trump’s policies.

    The Outro

    Streisand has been a hugely successful singer, actress, director, producer over six decades. However, when it comes to pop music, there’s not a lot to recommend, other than No More Tears (Enough Is Enough). And that’s most likely down to Summer and Moroder.

    The Info

    Written by

    Barry Gibb & Robin Gibb

    Producers

    Barry Gibb, Albhy Galuten & Karl Richardson

    Weeks at number 1

    3 (25 October-14 November)

    Trivia

    Births

    26 October: Scottish actor Khalid Abdalla
    28 October: Footballer Alan Smith
    12 November: Rugby union player Charlie Hodgson

    Deaths

    26 October: Northern Irish playwright Sam Cree
    27 October: T Rex singer-songwriter Steve Peregrin Took
    29 October: Actress Ouida MacDermott
    30 October: Actor Guy Bellis
    3 November: Actor Dennis Burgess/Horticulturalist David Lowe
    4 November: Radio broadcaster Paul Kaye/Boxer Johnny Owen
    6 November: Literary scholar Nevill Coghill
    7 November: Theatre director Norman Marshall
    8 November: Scottish painter Gordon Robert Archibald/Astrophysicist Valerie Myerscough/Film producer Julian Wintle
    9 November: Social researcher Pearl Jephcott
    10 November: Journalist Patrick Campbell, 3rd Baron Glenavy/Painter James Priddey
    11 November: Suffragette Connie Lewcock
    12 November: John Chetwynd-Talbot, 21st Earl of Shrewsbury
    14 November: Dance critic Arnold Haskell

    Meanwhile…

    28 October: Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher declares her government will not back down to seven jailed IRA terrorists on hunger strike in the Maze Prison, who are hoping to gain prisoner of war status.

    5 November: The Yorkshire Ripper is suspected responsible when 16-year-old Huddersfield mother Theresa Sykes is wounded in a hammer attack.

    10 November: Michael Foot, the left-wing Deputy Leader of the Labour Party, is elected as their new Leader.

    13 November: Security guard George Smith is shot dead when the van he guards is intercepted by armed robbers in Willenhall, West Midlands.

    466. Kelly Marie – Feels Like I’m in Love (1980)

    / robbarker1979 / 1 Comment

    The Intro

    ‘BOO BOO! BOO BOO! BOO BOO! BOO BOO!’ It’s cheap. It’s tacky. It’s the arse-end of disco. But I love Kelly Marie’s Feels Like I’m in Love and I’m not ashamed of it.

    Before

    By 1977, Mungo Jerry’s fame was drying up. It was seven years since In the Summertime, six since their last number 1 Baby Jump, and they hadn’t charted in the UK since Long Legged Woman Dressed in Black peaked at 13 in 1974. But they still had a following in Europe, and singer-songwriter Ray Dorset hoped that Elvis Presley might record a demo of his called Feels Like I’m in Love. Dorset impersonates Presley here, so you can easily imagine what a fleshed-out version would have sounded like.

    Unfortunately of course, ‘the King’ died that year, and Way Down became his last new number 1, signposting a move to disco that was never realised for Elvis. Mungo Jerry recorded Feels Like I’m in Love and it was relegated to a B-side for their Belgian single Sur Le Pont D’avignon. Two years later, Scottish singer Kelly Marie chanced across the song in a music publishing office.

    Marie was born Jacqueline McKinnon in Paisley, Scotland on 16 October 1957. She wanted to be a star from a young age and her parents were happy to help, entering her at voice and drama school at the wee age of 10. Two years later she was singing in competitions and at 15 she made her TV debut. Aged 16 she was appearing on Thames Television’s popular ITV talent show Opportunity Knocks. As Keli Brown, she won four times with her cover of I Don’t Know How to Love Him from the musical Jesus Christ Superstar.

    The exposure led to her signing with Pye Records in 1976 as Kelly Marie, and she went to number 1 in France with her debut single Who’s That Lady with My Man. She also featured on Joe Dolan’s number two hit in Ireland, Sister Mary. But despite a few hits in South Africa and Australia, including most notably Run to Me in 1977 and Make Love to Me in 1978, it didn’t look like she was ever going to trouble the UK charts. Singles came thick and fast in 1978, including Loving Just for Fun, a prototype for Feels Like I’m in Love, even including a very similar synth-drum sound. Nothing charted.

    One day in 1979, Marie and her producer Peter Yellowstone were in the Red Bus Music office, where they came across Dorset’s tune. They saw its potential and set to work.

    Review

    These days Feels Like I’m in Love is laughed at. A low-budget, throwaway, cheesy disco track sung by a very ordinary looking club singer with a distinct lack of subtlety. Coming after classics like The Winner Takes It All, Ashes to Ashes and Start!, it simply doesn’t hold up. Balls to all this is what I say. Least of all, the detractors of Marie’s appearance – there’s no need, and fair play to her for adopting the early 80s boiler suit look.

    OK, cards on the table – nostalgia plays an important part in the personal appeal of Feels Like I’m in Love. One of my very earliest memories involves playing this at my Nanna and Granddad’s house. I was very young, but it must have been a few years after it was number 1, as I was born in 1979. But in my head, it was this moment in which I fell in love with pop itself – the title had a very literal meaning for me.

    Hearing that effervescent, bouncy backing, complete with the infectious ‘BOO BOO! BOO BOO! BOO BOO! BOO BOO!’ synth drum, was like downing a bag of sugar. Everything was turned up to the max, including Marie’s voice. I remember thinking that being in love sounded brilliant. The instrumental break was exciting and I lost myself in it, and by the time the grand finale, with the ‘ahhs’ comes in, I felt sick with happiness and excitement. I felt alive. Hearing that swirling intro unexpectedly still takes me right back to that moment.

    So yes, it’s very hard to be objective about something that had a personal impact like Feels Like I’m in Love. However, I’d still defend it as a very catchy example of cheap and cheerful late-period Brit disco. Marie of course gives it the welly it deserves, but the star here is Yellowstone’s production.

    The video also turns up the camp, with Marie on a ship with two sailors, who go off on a tour of London, performing in front of mostly non-plussed people. At the end the sailors are back on their ship, waving off Marie who’s now on a tiny boat, heading for London Bridge.

    After

    Feels Like I’m in Love was released in 1979 but didn’t make a mark anywhere other than South Africa. But upon re-release a year later, it was gaining traction in the discos of Scotland, and then England. Climbing the charts, Marie achieved what must have felt unthinkable only a year previous. For two weeks in September, she was number 1, and she was a hit all over Europe too.

    The success was short-lived. Marie rushed out a re-release of Loving Just for Fun, but it sounded like a pale retread of her biggest single, and it peaked at 21. Hot Love in 1981 was her last charting single, reaching 22. UK disco was on its way out, to be replaced by Hi-NRG, which you could argue was exactly what Feels Like I’m in Love was an early version of.

    Marie continued releasing singles and performing at clubs throughout the 80s and 90s. In 2005 she appeared on the ITV talent show featuring stars of yesteryear, Hit Me, Baby, One More Time. She lost out to Chesney Hawkes.

    The Outro

    There were two inferior remixes of her number 1 in the 90s. Stock Aitken Waterman may have been responsible for many Hi-NRG classics in the early to mid-80s, but by 1991 they had run out of steam, and their version is a pale imitation. The 97 remix is even worse.

    The Info

    Written by

    Ray Dorset

    Producer

    Peter Yellowstone

    Weeks at number 1

    2 (13-26 September)

    Trivia

    Deaths

    14 September : Fashion journalist Alison Settle
    17 September: Enid Warren
    18 September: Antiquarian Edward Croft-Murray/Opera singer Walter Midgley
    22 September: Labour politician Raymond Dobson/Town planner JR James
    23 September: Cricketer Geoffrey Latham/Linguist Alan SC Ross
    24 September: Novelist Jacky Gillott/Mycologist Clarence James Hickman
    25 September: Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham

    Meanwhile…

    13 September: Hercules, a popular TV bear, which had gone missing on a Scottish island while filming an advert for Kleenex toilet tissue, is found.

    21 September: The CND hold a rally at RAF Greenham Common for the first time.

    24 September: 34-year-old Singapore-born doctor Upadhya Bandara is attacked and left injured by Peter Sutcliffe in Headingley, Leeds.

    463. ABBA – The Winner Takes It All (1980)

    / robbarker1979

    The Intro

    It had been nearly two years since ABBA had last topped the charts, with the upbeat bounce of Take a Chance on Me. You won’t find any of that in The Winner Takes It All. One of the saddest number 1s you’ll ever hear details the break-up of a relationship – and you don’t have to look far to find the inspiration.

    Before

    ABBA: The Album had cemented the group’s status as one of the biggest and best in the world back in 1978. They converted a disused cinema in their hometown of Stockholm into Polar Music Studio, which would be used by huge acts including Led Zeppelin and Genesis. They also paid tribute to Stockholm with their next single, but Summer Night City proved problematic to record. It would peak at five in the UK. Nonetheless, it would signpost that ABBA’s next LP, Voulez-Vous, would be a further move into disco.

    Not that you’d know that from their next single. The ballad Chiquitita was premiered at the Music for UNICEF charity concert on 9 January 1979, and released in the UK. Although the song gained the highest initial position of any ABBA single (eight), it couldn’t quite hit the top spot, finishing up at two behind Heart of Glass. But it remains one of the most famous charity singles ever.

    While Chiquitita was charting, Björn Ulvaeus and Agnetha Fältskog announced they were getting divorced. Understandably, the media and fans wondered if this meant the end of ABBA, but everyone was reassured they would continue. In fact, it was hoped that now the news was out, they could get back to recording their troubled sixth album. Songwriters Ulvaeus and Benny Andersson decamped to an apartment in the Bahamas and they concentrated on listening to the latest sounds emanating from the US, which were mainly disco.

    Voulez-Vous was released that April, with the next single, Does Your Mother Know, standing out due to Fältskog and Anni-Frid Lyngstad uncharacteristically being relegated to backing vocals. It stalled at four. The title track came next, billed as a double A-side with Angeleyes. Surprisingly, despite the former being one of their most famous and catchiest tunes, couldn’t get higher than three. When the similarly impressive Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight) peaked at the same position (released to coincide with their second greatest hits compilation), it may have started to look like perhaps ABBA’s number 1 days were over. Which would have been OK – after all, they had notched up seven, which was more than anyone achieved in the 70s. Their last single that decade, the cheesy I Have a Dream, couldn’t get higher than two.

    Following an enormously successful tour, including six sold-out nights at Wembley Arena, ABBA reconvened in Feb 1980 to start work on their seventh album. Perhaps due to the disco backlash in the US, and the looming divorce, they reverted to a more pop sound, with added mature lyrics that had been hinted at with songs like Knowing Me, Knowing You. Only this time, The Winner Takes It All mirrored Ulvaeus and Fältskog’s personal experiences at least, to a degree.

    Ulvaeus and Andersson had written the first released fruits of Super Trouper in the summer of 1979 in a cottage on the island of Viggsö. Originally called The Story of My Life (a title that scans well with the chorus), The Winner Takes It All started out more uptempo. However, they found the demo too stiff, and when they returned to the song four days later, Andersson had come up with a looser structure and a suitably sadder arrangement thanks to the descending piano line. Impressed, Ulvaeus recorded a new demo and garbled nonsense-French lyrics over the tune (due to its new chanson feel). He then took the recording home and got drunk on whiskey. He later claimed the words to The Winner Takes It All were the quickest he ever wrote, coming to him in a blast of emotion within the hour.

    Ulvaeus has claimed more than once that The Winner Takes It All shouldn’t be taken as a literal recount of his divorce, pointing out that there was no winner or loser in their experience. But he didn’t deny that his sadness over their marriage breakdown had inspired the song to an extent. To quote Knowing Me, Knowing You, ‘Breaking up is never easy’. And it certainly hit home for Fältskog, who shed tears when presented with the lyrics.

    Review

    The sadness in The Winner Takes It All is so real, it can actually be unbearable if it gets you at a bad time. Compare it with What’s Another Year – workmanlike maudlin misery with no sense of authenticity. Ulvaeus’ lyrics are painfully honest – I believe him when he says they’re not directly inspired by what he went through, but good God, there’s no wonder they hit a nerve with poor Fältskog. Those first three lines:

    ‘I don’t wanna talk,
    About things we’ve gone through,
    Though it’s hurting me, now it’s history’.

    Ouch. Likely a fair summation of the mood in Polar Studios, post-divorce, between the former couple. From there, I’m not sure of the levels of fiction involved, but the title of the song and the comparison with a card game suggests some other woman has won her man, or perhaps it’s even about who got what in a court battle. ‘That’s her destiny’ suggests the former, while the references to judges later suggests the latter, so maybe it’s both.

    The second verse talks of the spurned partner’s mistaken sense of security and hopes for the future, but that they now feel they were a fool to play ‘by the rules’. By verse three, she very much does want to talk. She’s angry and is asking those internal questions the mind asks even when the heart is too scared to find out the answer. She wants to know how her ex’s new love compares to her. By the time she gets to her confession she misses him, but is resigned to playing by the rules of the game. She’s lost.

    The final verse, now that’s the hardest part to bear. An apologetic Fältskog feels sorry for making her ex feel sad about how things turned out, and although she’s trying to come to terms with their more formal future (‘And I understand, you’ve come to shake my hand’), it’s too hard. She’s ‘tense, no self-confidence’, but what does she do? She apologises, because she cares still. It’s heart-wrenching.

    As someone who’s only really getting to grips with how great ABBA were, I must admit that previously, I didn’t really care for The Winner Takes It All particularly. Musically, I saw it as another example of ABBA’s high camp and melodramatic tendencies. I knew it was connected to marital woes, but it’s taken middle age and, more importantly, my own divorce to understand just how very real and painful this song is. ABBA were coming to the end of the road, but they approached it with grace and honesty. And I was wrong about the tune too, because it’s actually pretty funky when you really listen – courtesy of the session rhythm section, Ola Brunkert on drums and Mike Watson on bass.

    Ulvaeus’ lyrics are thoughtful, but the same can’t be said for whoever signed off on the video. As usual, their director Lasse Hallström took a very literal approach, and really blurred the lines of truth and fiction. Following black and white images of ABBA in happier times, we cut to a dejected and pained Fältskog in close-up, singing inbetween footage of the rest of the band having a laugh. Her face at the end is almost too much to bear when you consider the video was shot only 10 days after the divorce was officially declared.

    After

    The Winner Takes It All was a worldwide hit, becoming number 1 in the UK, Ireland, Belgium, the Netherlands and South Africa. It also performed well in Austria, France, West Germany and Sweden, and became their final US hit. The signs were very good for the parent album, Super Trouper.

    The Outro

    Rob Brydon and Steve Coogan’s rendition of ABBA’s penultimate number 1 from their series The Trip is well worth a watch if you’d rather not get too caught up in the inherent misery of the song.

    The Info

    Writers & producers

    Benny Andersson & Björn Ulvaeus

    Weeks at number 1

    2 (9-22 August)

    Trivia

    Births

    19 August: Actor Adam Campbell/Singer Darius Danesh

    Deaths

    9 August: Comedian Audrey Jeans
    10 August: Philosopher Gareth Evans
    18 August: Rower Harold Kitching
    20 August: Historian AK Hamilton Jenkin/Historian Dame Lucy Sutherland
    21 August: Actor Norman Shelley

    Meanwhile…

    11 August: Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher visits Harold Hill in East London to hand over the keys to the 12,000th council tenants to buy their home under the right to buy scheme. When she does so, she’s booed by neighbours of the family in East London.
    Also that day, Tyne and Wear Metro opens on Tyneside.

    16 August: The Denmark Place fire kills 37 people of eight nationalities, after an arson attack. Petty criminal John Thompson was thrown out of The Spanish Place – one of two unlicensed bars on the top two floors of 18 Denmark Place (Rodo’s was the other). He found a container, hailed a taxi to a petrol station, filled it with petrol, poured it through the letterbox of the venue, and threw a lit piece of paper inside. The fire swept through the building so quickly, many inside died on the spot.

    20 August: 47-year-old Marguerite Walls became Peter Sutcliffe’s 12th known victim, strangled to death on her way home from work in Leeds.

    441. Cliff Richard – We Don’t Talk Anymore (1979)

    / robbarker1979

    The Intro

    Remember this guy? Once a mainstay of this blog, the ‘Peter Pan of Pop’ hadn’t topped the charts since Congratulations won Eurovision in 1968. 11 years later, Cliff Richard’s comeback, which began with Devil Woman, was complete with this 10th number 1.

    Before

    The Shadows, who often acted as Richard’s backing band, with who he shared many hits and number 1s, decided to split at the end of 1968. Their last single together was Don’t Forget to Catch Me, which reached 21. Despite being unfashionable, he still had a large enough following to notch up plenty of hits, ending the 60s with two top 10 hits in 1969 – Big Ship (eight) and Throw Down a Line (with Shadows guitarist Hank Marvin), climbing to seven.

    The 70s began with Richard fronting his own BBC series, It’s Cliff Richard, which ran from 1970 to 1976 and featured the singer with musical friends including Marvin and Olivia Newton-John. His 50th single, the intriguingly named Goodbye Sam, Hello Samantha, went all the way to six in 1970. Many of Richard’s singles for the first half of the 70s were in line with his Christian beliefs – I’m not going to listen to them all to find out, but I’d put money on Jesus (1972) being a prime example.

    Having been considered almost as much an actor as a singer in his peak years of the 60s, Richard gave up his film career after starring in the film Take Me High in 1973. He also had another bash at the Eurovision Song Contest that year. Power to All Our Friends finished third that year. Apparently he was so nervous during the competition he took valium and his manager struggled to wake him. It was at least a big hit, climbing to four and earning him his best chart performance for the next six years.

    The next couple of years were lean for the not-very-mean machine. His only single in 1974, (You Keep Me) Hangin’ On did OK (13), but he messed up in 1975 when he chose to cover Conway Twitty’s Honky Tonk Angel. Richard recorded a video, 1,000 singles were pressed up and EMI expected it to perform well, but when Richard discovered ‘honky tonk angel’ was Southern American slang for a prostitute, the whiter-than-white pop star was horrified and insisted it was withdrawn. What on earth would God have made of it? This meant that, for the first time in his career, Richard had gone a calendar year without a chart entry.

    However, it was decided that, rather than continue down the purely righteous path Richard seemed hell-bent on, he should be repackaged as a rock singer. At the time this must have seemed laughable, and to be honest I’m struggling to imagine it while typing this. But, good Lord, it worked!

    Teaming up with Bruce Welch (another guitarist from the Shadows) on production duties, the nicely titled LP I’m Nearly Famous was an unexpected smash. And not only commercially – guitarists Jimmy Page and Eric Clapton were just two of the rock stars spotted wearing ‘I’m Nearly Famous’ badges in honour of the comeback kid. Although Miss You Nights (15) was a ballad, the follow-up, Devil Woman, is a classic slab of pop-rock, with a hell of a chorus. And listen, that’s Cliff Richard singing a song with ‘devil’ in it! With punk rock rearing its ugly head, a more edgy Cliff Richard was very timely.

    The comeback didn’t last long though. The next album, Every Picture Tells a Story, spawned only one hit – My Kinda Life (number 15 in 1977). Perhaps feeling he must atone for his sins, Richard then released an album of Christian gospel called Small Corners in 1978. Neither that or his next pop LP, Green Light, performed well. 1978 was also the year Richard reunited with The Shadows for concerts at the London Palladium, as captured on Thank You Very Much.

    Despite appearing on stage with Welch once more, the Shadows guitarist didn’t produce his next album, Rock’n’Roll Juvenile. That honour went to Terry Britten, who had worked with Richard many times in the past. Recording sessions began back in July 1978 but vocals weren’t begun until January 1979.

    We Don’t Talk Anymore was recorded in one day, five months later. For some reason, Welch received production credit for Richard’s 10th number 1. It was written and arranged by Alan Tarney, a new collaborator, who also played guitar, keyboards, synthesiser and bass on the track, as well as performing backing vocals. On drums was his former bandmate in Quartet, Trevor Spencer.

    Review

    It’s no Devil Woman, but We Don’t Talk Anymore is a decent pop song and Richard’s best number 1 since Summer Holiday in 1963. I have to confess that I used to think this came much later in his career, and was a Stock Aitken Waterman production from the late-80s or early-90s. It’s something about that catchy, melancholic yet soaring chorus combined with a very light production sound. In its own way, it’s as contemporary as Are ‘Friends’ Electric? with its keyboard-heavy arrangement. Though not nearly as good.

    Has to be said though, I’ve never heard Richard sound so passionate. I mean, it’s not exactly a raw, emotional performance – this is Cliff Richard we’re talking about after all. But he gives it a rare bit of oomph! The verses are pretty bog-standard ‘my woman has left me’ and not much to write home about – it’s all about the earworm of the chorus really, and the emotion at the end. Weird lyrical phrasing too – ‘It’s so funny/How we don’t talk anymore’. None too shabby. With The Beatles long gone and Elvis Presley six feet under, Richard could still sell records, when he tried.

    The video for We Don’t Talk Anymore is as 70s as it gets, featuring Richard and band performing amid a smoky stage, Richard occasionally merging into himself through a dated but charming kaleidoscopic effect.

    After

    Cliff Richard fared better in the 80s than the 70s, regularly appearing in the upper reaches of the charts. But it would be seven years before his 11th number 1, for which he shared billing with a series named after one of his most famous chart-toppers…

    The Info

    Written by

    Alan Tarney

    Producer

    Bruce Welch

    Weeks at number 1

    4 (25 August-21 September)

    Trivia

    Births

    14 September: Rugby league player Stuart Fielden

    Deaths

    27 August: Louis Mountbatten, 1st Earl Mountbatten of Burma (see ‘Meanwhile…’)
    28 August: Doreen Knatchbull, Baroness Brabourne
    29 August: Painter Ivon Hitchens

    Meanwhile…

    27 August: Lord Mountbatten of Burma, cousin to the Queen and uncle of the Duke of Edinburgh, was assassinated by a Provisional IRA bomb while on board a boat when holidaying in the Republic of Ireland. His 15-year-old nephew Nicholas Knatchbull and boatboy Paul Maxwell were also killed, and Dowager Lady Brabourne died from injuries sustained a day later.
    Also that day, 18 British soldiers were killed in Northern Ireland at the Warrenpoint ambush.

    30 August: Two men were arrested in Dublin and charged with the murder of Lord Mountbatten and the three other victims of the bombing.

    2 September: Police found the body of 20-year-old student Barbara Leach in an alleyway near Bradford city centre. She was to be named as the 12th victim of the Yorkshire Ripper.

    5 September: The Queen lead mourning at the funeral of Lord Mountbatten.
    Also on this day, Manchester City paid a British club record fee of £1,450,000 for Wolverhampton Wanderers midfielder Steve Daley.

    8 September: Wolverhampton Wanderers broke the record by paying just under £1,500,000 for Aston Villa and Scotland striker Andy Gray. 

    10 September: British Leyland announced production of MG cars would cease in the autumn of 1980. 

    14 September: The government announced plans to regenerate the London Docklands through housing and commercial developments.

    21 September: A Royal Air Force Harrier jet crashed into a house in Wisbech, Cambridgeshire, killing two men and a boy. 

    435. Gloria Gaynor – I Will Survive (1979)

    / robbarker1979

    The Intro

    US soul singer Gloria Gaynor’s disco classic I Will Survive was originally an afterthought, a B-side, with little studio sheen added. It’s now considered a feminist and LGBTQ+ anthem and is a karaoke mainstay.

    Before

    Gaynor was born Gloria Fowles on 7 September 1943 in Newark, New Jersey. Music was a constant in her youth, with her father Daniel singing and playing ukulele as part of a nightclub group called Step ‘n’ Fetch-it. The Fowles were a large, poor family – five boys and two girls, including Gloria. Four brothers formed a gospel group but she wasn’t allowed to join them. The family moved to a housing project in 1960 and a year later Fowles graduated.

    She became a singer in a local nightclub and within a few years she was part of jazz and R’n’B group The Soul Satisfiers. In 1965, as Gloria Gaynor, she released her debut single She’ll Be Sorry. It was produced by Johnny Nash, later to have a UK number 1 with Tears on My Pillow (I Can’t Take It). It was Nash who had suggested she change her name.

    Nothing came of it but Gaynor spent years becoming experienced at performing live. Then in 1973 she was signed to Columbia Records by Clive Davis and released another flop, Honey Bee.

    Gaynor hit pay dirt when she signed to MGM Records and released debut album Never Can Say Goodbye in 1975. The first side consisted of a remake of Honey Bee, plus covers of soul classics Never Can Say Goodbye and Reach Out, I’ll Be There. Thanks to an uncredited Tom Moulton, this record contained a historic first – it was the first album to consist of one long continuous mix of the tracks. This earned Moulton the title ‘father of the disco mix’. The title track became a hit single, peaking at two in the UK and nine in the US. Reach Out, I’ll Be There then reached 14 on these shores.

    It began to look like Gaynor would be a flash in the pan as singles from Experience Gloria Gaynor didn’t grab the attention of the public. One exception was a cover of jazz standard How High the Moon, which climbed to 33 in 1975. Her next few albums – I’ve Got You (1976), Glorious (1977) and Gloria Gaynor’s Park Avenue Sound (1978) all bombed.

    Gaynor’s next LP, Love Tracks, was recorded for release in November 1978. A month before that came the single Substitute. Her label Polydor thought this former Righteous Brothers track would be a worldwide hit as it had been for South Africa girlband Clout. However, several DJs – including Richie Kaczor of Studio 54 – began taking note of the B-side, I Will Survive, instead.

    It had been written by two former Motown producers, Dino Fekaris and Freddie Perren. The latter had co-written three Jackson 5 US number 1s – I Want You Back, The Love You Save and ABC. After being sacked by Motown, Fekaris was unemployed and wrote the lyrics to I Will Survive after seeing a song he’d written for Rare Earth being used on TV. He took it as a sign things would work out. And they did.

    Fekaris and Perren formed their own production company and made Reunited with Peaches and Herb, which became a hit. Afterwards they decided to give I Will Survive to the next singer they worked with. Gaynor was the lucky one.

    https://youtu.be/ARt9HV9T0w8

    Review

    On Gaynor’s previous hits, her voice was pitched up in order to make her songs faster for playing on the dancefloor. And as with most disco songs, the productions would feature a more polished, layered production. It’s interesting to consider whether I Will Survive would have been treated the same way had it been considered for the A-side originally. I’m not sure it would have the same power if it had been.

    The highlight of the track is Gaynor’s raw, soulful performance. You really feel the hurt and anger in her voice and the message of the song suits an untamed vocal without any studio trickery. Though the performance is raw and the production understated, the piano at the beginning and the strings after the chorus do a great job of adding to the drama of the song.

    Pop songs about love going wrong often portray the ‘loser’ as weak. Even the icy cool Debbie Harry lets the mask slip briefly in Heart of Glass. But what Gaynor does is fool us into thinking she’s not over her heartbreak during those opening lines. But once she sings ‘And I grew strong, and I learned how to get along’, the song moves up a notch, and from then on, Gaynor sounds like someone you shouldn’t mess with as she belts out those lyrics to I Will Survive.

    Obviously, I Will Survive has survived and will always be considered one of the highlights of the disco era. It’s an alluring theme for a song, that of empowerment for the underdog, so there’s no wonder it was adopted, as previously mentioned, by feminists and the LGBTQ+ movement, both fighting back against an era in which political correctness wasn’t high on the agenda of mainstream culture.

    However, although there is a lot to enjoy here, I Will Survive is not up there with my favourite disco songs. A lot of that, to be fair, isn’t down to the song, or to Gaynor. It’s the way it’s been done to death over the years by the media. It’s all the parodies. It’s drunk people bawling it when leaving the pub, followed by It’s Raining Men. It’s just a bit tiresome, sadly.

    I used to wonder why Gaynor’s performance seemed slightly weird in the video to I Will Survive. It was filmed at the New York discotheque Xenon. Her stance is unusual and she looks genuinely pained. She was. Giving the song a whole new dimension is the fact that in 1978 Gaynor fell over a monitor on stage during a choreographed tug-of-war with her dancers. She was paralysed from the waist down and thought she would never walk again. Surgery helped Gaynor back on her feet but she recorded the song, and the video, in a lot of pain and wearing a back brace. It wasn’t until further surgery in 2018 that the pain went away.

    As for the rollerskating dancer in the video, that was Sheila-Reid Pender from skating group The Village Wizards. Gaynor and Pender were filmed separately and didn’t meet until 2014 at a book signing event held for Gaynor’s autobiography, We Will Survive.

    After

    The song was a global smash and topped the charts in many countries. It came along just in time, as by the end of the year the disco backlash, mainly a thinly veiled excuse for homophobes, racists and sexists to vent anger, had begun.

    Hits were few and far between from then on. Let Me Know (I Have a Right) climbed to 32 in the UK in 1979 but it was four years before her next success. She became a Christian in 1982 and distanced herself from what she considered a sinful past. Then in 1983 her version of I Am What I Am also became adopted by the gay community as an anthem and climbed to 13 in the UK chart.

    For the rest of the 80s Gaynor continued to release music but nothing troubled the mainstream. DJ and producer Shep Pettibone remixes of I Will Survive were released in 1990. They didn’t chart, but Phil Kelsey’s remix in 1993 coincided with a nostalgic interest in disco and peaked at five. With Gaynor back in the public eye she turned to acting in the late 90s, with cameos in That 70s Show and Ally McBeal.

    The Outro

    Gaynor continues to release albums sporadically, and of course, I Will Survive has been revisited many times over her career, with remixes, Spanish language versions and lyrics sometimes rewritten to reflect her Christian beliefs and also referencing tragedies such as Hurricane Harvey in Texas in 2017. Her most recent album, the roots gospel collection Testimony, earned Gaynor her second Grammy, 20 years after her first.

    There’s been many covers of I Will Survive over the years and the rock version by Cake in 1996 is well worth a mention.

    The Info

    Written by

    Dino Fekaris & Freddie Perren

    Producer

    Dino Fekaris

    Weeks at number 1

    4 (17 March-13 April)

    The Info

    Births

    9 April: Actor Ben Silverstone
    10 April: Singer Sophie Ellis-Bextor

    Deaths

    19 March: Actor Richard Beckinsale
    23 March: Footballer Ted Anderson
    24 March: Founder of Tesco Sir Jack Cohen
    30 March: Tory MP Airey Neave

    Meanwhile…

    17 March: Nottingham Forest defeat Southampton 3-2 at Wembley Stadium to win the Football League Cup for the second year running. 

    18 March: Three men are killed in an explosion at the Golborne colliery in Golborne, Greater Manchester. 

    22 March: Sir Richard Sykes, ambassador to the Netherlands, is shot dead by a member of the Provisional IRA in the Hague. 

    28 March: The Labour government loses a motion of confidence by just one vote, which forces a General Election.

    29 March: Prime Minister James Callaghan announces a General Election will be held on 3 May. Having missed the chance to call one before the Winter of Discontent swayed public opinion against Labour, all the major opinion polls point towards a Conservative win, which would make Margaret Thatcher the first female Prime Minister.

    30 March: Tory Northern Ireland spokesman Airey Neave is killed by an Irish National Liberation Army bomb in the car park of the House of Commons.

    31 March: The Royal Navy withdraws from Malta. 

    4 April: 19-year-old bank worker Josephine Whitaker is murdered in Halifax. Police believe she is the 11th woman to be murdered by the Yorkshire Ripper. 

    423. Boney M – Rivers of Babylon (1978)

    / robbarker1979

    The Intro

    Boney M were one of the most popular disco acts of the 70s and scored one of the biggest number 1s of all time with this cover of a Rastafari song by The Melodians. In a year in which the singles charts were returning to importance after years of dominance by albums, Boney M were the most popular. And they were the first of several pop acts to spring from the mind of Frank Farian.

    Before

    Farian, born Franz Reuther in Kirn, Germany on 18 July 1941 had trained as a cook before moving into the music industry. As Frankie Farian he released his first single, Will You Ever Be Mine in 1967.

    He wasn’t really making much of an impression until he recorded Baby Do You Wanna Bump in 1974. It was a remake of Jamaican ska singer-songwriter Prince Buster’s Al Capone from 1964. However, in the first of many performance and songwriter controversies from Farian, there was no mention of Prince Buster within the credits.

    Farian provided all the vocals and when deciding on an alias for the release, he was inspired while watching an episode of Australian detective drama Boney. He just stuck an ‘M’ on the end for added mystery.

    Slowly, the single picked up steam in the Netherlands and Belgium. Farian decided to put a group together to promote it on TV. The first line-up of Boney M in 1975 consisted of Montserrat-born model-turned-singer Maizie Williams, her Jamaican friend Sheila Bonnick and a dancer called Mike. Several changes took place before the group settled down in 1976 with Williams, Jamaican-British singer Liz Mitchell, Aruban exotic dancer Bobby Farrell and Jamaican Marcia Barrett.

    Farian set to work on Boney M’s debut LP, Take the Heat Off Me. It became apparent that he couldn’t use either Williams’ or Farrell’s voices and would instead use his own along with Barrett’s (who had already recorded solo with Farrell) and Mitchell’s. Again, the response was initially lukewarm but Farian pushed them to tour constantly, performing at discos, clubs and even country fairs.

    The breakthrough occurred when they appeared on West German TV show Musikladen in September wearing outlandish outfits during a performance of Daddy Cool. It shot to 1 in several European countries and peaked at five in the UK. Follow-up Sunny rose to number three over here. Disco was peaking and Boney M had come along at exactly the right time.

    In 1977 they released second album Love for Sale and it spawned two hits – Ma Baker (number two) and Belfast (eight). Undertaking their first major tour, Farian lined up live musicians known as The Black Beauty Circus to provide backing.

    Boney M’s first release of 1978 was taken from forthcoming third album Nightflight to Venus. Rivers of Babylon was written by Brent Dowe and Trevor McNaughton of rocksteady Jamaican act The Melodians. Released in 1970, the lyrics were adapted from the texts of Psalms 19 and mainly 137 in the Hebrew Bible. The latter expressed the thoughts of Jewish people in exile after the Babylonian conquest of Jerusalem in 586 BC. It contains the line ‘By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down, yea, we wept, when we remembered Zion.’

    Rivers of Babylon was a big hit in Jamaica once the government lifted a ban on it and it became famous internationally after it appeared in the 1972 film The Harder They Come.

    Featuring Mitchell on lead vocal and Barrett and Farian on backing vocals, the Boney M version showcased Farian’s standard disco-lite sound, removing all Rastafarian language from the lyrics. The initial single mix featured extra ad-libs from Mitchell and all single versions feature extra vocals from Farian as well as a different fadeout to the LP version. Initially, Dowe and McNaughton didn’t receive any songwriting credit until they rightly kicked up a fuss.

    https://youtu.be/HTq7vE_5un4

    Review

    I’ve never liked Boney M and I can’t see that ever changing. This blog has helped shift my attitude to realise how good ABBA actually were, for example, but I think Boney M are so cheap, tacky and throwaway and re-listening now has made little difference.

    There are disco versions of every style of song going but I find taking a song about Biblical plight in poor taste, or maybe that’s just down to my inbuilt dislike of Boney M. I guess though that it’s more respectful than other Boney M hits. Mitchell is a great singer, so there is that, but Farian’s vocals are awful, which makes me wonder how much worse Farrell’s must have been.

    So here is another example of the madness of British record buyers. Not only was Rivers of Babylon the biggest-selling single of 1978 but it’s the seventh biggest-selling single OF ALL TIME. What the fuck?

    After

    After five weeks at the top, it was slipping down the charts and was at 20 when DJs began playing the B-side, a cover of traditional Caribbean nursery rhyme Brown Girl in the Ring. It became a hit in its own right and took the single all the way to number two. This seems highly unfair to me but it at least partly explains why something so poor could sell so well.

    The Info

    Written by

    Frank Farian, George Reyam, Brent Dowe & Trevor McNaughton

    Producer

    Frank Farian

    Weeks at number 1

    5 (13 May-16 June) *BEST-SELLING SINGLE OF THE YEAR*

    Trivia

    Births

    14 May: Scottish field hockey defender Emma Rochlin
    22 May: Model Katie Price
    6 June: The Libertines singer Carl Barât
    9 June: Muse singer Matthew Bellamy

    Death

    18 May: Conservative MP Selwyn Lloyd
    7 June: Nobel Prize laureate Ronald George Wreyford Norrish

    Meanwhile…

    16 May: 40-year-old prostitute Vera Millward is found stabbed to death in the grounds of Manchester Royal Infirmary. It is believed that she is the 10th woman to die at the hands of the Yorkshire Ripper and the second outside of Yorkshire.

    17 May: Charlie Chaplin’s coffin, stolen 11 weeks previously, is discovered in a field near the Chaplin home in Corsier near Lausanne, Switzerland.

    25 May: Liberal Party leader David Steel announces the Lib-Lab pact is to be dissolved at the end of the Parliamentary session by mutual consent, which would leave Britain with a minority Labour government.

    3 June: Airline entrepreneur Freddie Laker is knighted.

    8 June: Naomi James becomes the first woman to sail around the world single-handedly.

    13–16 June: Romanian dictator Nicolae Ceausescu and his wife Elena make a state visit to the United Kingdom. He is made a Knight of the Order of the Bath and she becomes an honorary professor of the Polytechnic of Central London. How lovely.